I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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