I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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