We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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