there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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