aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize