It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
