I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize