Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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