Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Acid is not a monday night drug
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
