I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
