i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
His nipple licking is glorious
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize