Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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