is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
