Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
