So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
