her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
