her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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