He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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