Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
