Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
