honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
