my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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