My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
