Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize