ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize