11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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