so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
