Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize