All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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