he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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