laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
