I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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