Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
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