no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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