Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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