Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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