you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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