Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
