well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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