In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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