I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
