i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
