This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
