people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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