Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
