Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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