How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
