her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
