Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize