matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
