Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
The power of my boobs compel you
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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